sweet jesus, my hair.

life is toughing wearing your hair up everyday, for someone whose hair is probably.. well there favourite part of themselves. Not trying to blown my own trumpet or anything you know, you know.
But anyway the hairdresser is the human form of satan and absoloutely destroyed my hair with some tacky gold streaks. I've been fighting a battle with my hair since the start of the new year, i have desperately tried (and spent way loads) getting rid of the bright red i had for so long, trying to achieve a nice light brown that i could ombre for when its sunny and nice. I recall telling the hairdreser how much i despise highlights and that they were just not what i wanted, and she reassured me with how subtle what she was doing was and that it wasn't highlights, just steadily lightening my hair. I have had to wear my hair up every single day since the incident, its traumatic, it really is, i have a funny thing about the sides of my face being on show...
Having a constant bun on the top of my head is making me try a little harder with my makeup and stuff, be a little less casual so ive started to bring out the deep red lippyoh i look so solemn. smiling is a task when you hate your hair as much as i now do. luckily for your eyes you can't see the garishness in these photographs. I have this phobia that wearing your hair up makes your face look fatter.. well in my case i fear anyway, so i've been trying to keep up with the exercise this week, although i baled saturday and sunday, i just dont have the strength to force myselfs on the weekends, too lazy.
So im posting this picture here.. for my own benefit, in the hope that seeing it on my blog will remind me that i need to get on with the exercise and healthy eating so that i can actually leave the house in these shorts.. instead of just wearing them under things, so i apolagise for this unsightly picture, hopefully ill post one, one day, where im looking a little healthier! i ramble so much. repping brand new though.. they are great.

Me and my kitteeeeeeeh cat.
having a stressful time back at college with exam stuff, re-submissions of past work etc etc the list goes on. I often find myself sat at home treating myself to a well deserved cuppa, that hasnt really been deserved at all, having not done any work i am meant to have done. I feel myself slipping out of organisation and onto last minute mountain, its not a lonely place though i must admit. Either way, i've got a friends birthday massive gathering sort of thing on friday and ive nothing to wear as i always find, i hate all of my heels too, so dressing up a casual outfit isnt on the agenda either, i've been looking everywhere for some reasonably priced heeled loafers, baring in mind im on a fairly tight budget of student living (i feel college counts as that) if anyone has seen anything and is reading this... please please help me. this has been a pathetic ramble of an excuse for a post, enjoy my cat,baiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii.

A few days in london.

Ive been staying with my sister who lives in lamberth north in central london for a few days, its been really nice. I visited everywhere ive been before but couldnt really remember. Went to Spitalfields market and then to brick lane and all the markets around there, so many great shops, its packed with huge vintage shops aswell, there was lots i wanted but im saving my money so im sure ill be going back soon! Went to covent garden and piccadilly and soho and china town too, did a heck of a lot of walking which im still recovering from now. Had a lovely walk and lunch along the southbank yesterday morning. I miss london a heck of a lot and its really hit home how diverse and wonderful and interesting it is compared to living near southampton, as nice as the new forest can be, its just not great at this age. But anyway if your in London, id say brick lane is the place to be, on a weekend only i think though. got a couple of pictures - all the amazing food, my delicious lemon grass chicken, the cheesecake stall and the shop which was just full of random cats, one of the best shops ever.

This is the most recent picture of me i have and i felt as though i needed to update my old one, because i change my hair and stuff so often, currently desperately trying to remove the red from it and get it to a nice light brown so i can get some blonde through the ends, id like to have ombre but by the time i achieve it, it will probably be out of fashion haha.
Half term was great for me, i kept busy and had plans for everyday which i didnt think would happen, went to another awesome show in this guys house and then stayed for a massive chillout with everyone after. that was sweet, unfortunetely the half term didnt end well.
On Sunday my best friend text me and basically started a very big drama because i hadnt invited her to this gig that i went too, it sounds so ridiculously petty, and i believe it is, but she's found it a good enough reason not to talk to me anymore and not come into contact with me at college and stuff. It will happen sooner or later though and it will just be akward, but i've apolagised more than once, even where i dont feel i should have done, because really a friend invited me to go and as he was taking me there and back i didnt feel it was my place to invite my friend. should it have really mattered anyway?
I mean do you have to do everything with your best friend, i sometimes feel like it would be a weight of my shoulders not to have one anyway, i could do what i like without being judged, im sure in some cases best friends dont judge, but not in mine. I wouldnt have to worry about including her in everything i did or argueing with her and my life would probably be a lot more stress free.
so for now, im kind of happy. untill the time comes when this has to be sorted out. I needed somewhere to get this all out, hence the massive essay. not that i have enough followers to even read it anyway haha.

Defeater last night. a crappy picture as im no pro photographer but a picture at the least.
they were sick

keep forgetting to use this! im going to try really hard to keep it up.

anywayssssss, i should be going to this show tomorrow night
will be so awesome if i can. Went to laser quest today and played against some complete strangers, they thrashed us but it was awesome anyway.
now im desperately trying to keep myself from eating a whole packet of rich tea biscuits, waaaah

when dinner smells like pancakes. but its really chicken.. heartbreak.